C is in between B & D

You must be thinking what the hell, even a 2 year kid knows C is in between B & D and I will tell you, yes we all learnt C is in between B & D. I learnt the alphabet but I didnt learn that life is also the C between B & D. I know what some of my friends are reading this as ;)

But what I would like my kid to learn is life is the Choice that we make in between Birth and Death. Its all about the choices we make. One of my friend says, when we look back in time, our eye sight is always 20/20. We know what decision would have been right or which options should we have picked, unfortunately the same is not true when we live in the present. So how do we make the right choice? How do I know which choice is right and which choice is wrong? If I ask this question to anyone, they will tell me several different ways in which we can make the right decision a logically right decision of choice. Is logical option always the right thing? I think you will agree, not always.

In all aspects of life, I think there is nothing right or wrong. It depends on what type of personality you are, the situation, your state of mind and your relationships & beliefs. A simple example is, when we talk about different religions, we all feel our religion is the ultimate truth but others religious beliefs are full of superstitions. We are always juggling between my truth and your truth. Not only in the religious beliefs, we are juggling between the my truth and your truth in all aspects of our life. Where my truth is always, logical, correct, idealistic and the best or most optimum thing to do.

Sometime or the other, we all get into some sort of philosophical mode and think these things, we should go a little further and try to explore what is a good option to make myself happy. Be selfish and you will not only make yourself happy but also the people around you will be happy seeing you happy, peaceful and contended.
`
To be peaceful, happy and contended and to LIVE- is the ultimate goal of your life, for me it is the most fundamental requirement. If you think you can die, take this challenge, right now, hold your nose and close your mouth and do not let yourself breathe. To some of my friends, who feel taking your life is a great option to consider, DO IT NOW and then come and tell me do you still feel the same. Do you think you can take your life? NO, we all love ourselves and that makes us living. So being selfish is one of the fundamental rules if you want to be peaceful and happy.

Now let us explore some of the online tools that are at our disposal that can help us explore ourselves and understand our personality. How I am as a person, once we know this it is easier to make the right choices for ourselves. This is a science, that helps us balance our actions, it helps us understand how we perceive things, people, environment, situations.

Take any free Mayer & Briggs self assessment. Also read about the other types of personalities. Mayer & Briggs researched and concluded that there are 16 different types of personalities. Based on your personality, inherently you have your strengths and weaknesses. If you are aware of those strengths you can capitalize on them and work on your weaknesses. It also talks about what kind of profession might bring in more fulfillment for you. There are 100s of free assessments available, simply google and find it out. Some of them are:
i)   https://www.16personalities.com/
ii)  http://www.my-personality-test.com/personality-type/

You can also take Brain Dominance test that will tell you, if you are left or right brained. Remember both are good, no type is superior and no type is inferior. One free Brain Dominance test is available on http://www.ipn.at/ipn.asp?BHX

Another widely accepted tool is HBDI (Herrmann Brain Dominance Instrument). This is similar to Mayer Briggs but Mayer Briggs is based on phycological analysis whereas HBDI is based on cognitive analysis.

My mentor, who helped me learn all these things suggests, before you go to any of these tests, we should do a self introspection and write down our SWOT. These things are not going to take much time, so no harm giving it a try, even if you do not believe in these things. Might be you get to know about some of your strengths that you never bothered to think you have. Or might be it helps you understand why you or someone behaved in a particular manner in a situation.

Once you know yourself, you will be able to define your definition of success which will be totally different from the definition of success that the world has defined for you. But with this aroused awareness, you will be able to pursue your success, making you happy & contended. And this happiness will be contagious making others happy around you.

Remember, life is the C in between B & D and its you who has to make that C   :)

The Corporate Slave

In the name of getting better and growing in career, I feel I am growing into a slave – The Corporate Slave. I have completely forgot my existence, my life starts and ends at office or office work. Recently I travelled to my hometown and I noticed, although I was physically there, the slave attitude in me prompted me to keep thinking of the office and work. I was there for a very special family occasion and this was a very short vacation after 2 long years of exile. I wanted to enjoy every bit of the time but there was hardly a day when I did not pull out my office laptops or called some of my colleagues finding out the status of projects etc. Was this necessary??? Absolutely NO – then why did I do this? I did that because I have developed a syndrome and unnamed syndrome, that makes me think and feel that I cannot exist without the project and the office laptop and conference calls. That has become so much a part of me that I feel incomplete without that.

I pull out my laptop from my bag during a vacation with so much pride and glory and am so happy to get out of a family gathering or friends chit chat saying I have an important call to take. It is as if the whole world is going to collapse if I do not take that call. During my appraisal meeting, when my manager says, you have done “xxx” … you will have to put in more effort this year. I proudly say, you will never find me taking vacations and I work for 12, 13, 14 …. Hours a day. I don’t care if it’s a weekend, you will always find me dedicated to the work. I forget that I took a job to earn and have a good life. I am earning but to be a slave and not a good life. There are 1000s of duties and responsibilities that I have to discharge towards my parents, family, spouse, child, friends, society – I shy away from all that and still feel I am doing the right thing.

When I know for sure that this is wrong and this is not what I should be doing, this is not what I am born to do, why am I not able to get out of it? What is it that is holding me break these chains of slavery? Why is it that I sign a contract to work for 8 hours a day, I end up devoting my life. I started working to have a better life but where is “LIFE”? I left my back my LIFE and have become a Corporate Slave and what do I get in return? A promise, from the corporations that ONE DAY you can achieve the dreams we have shown you and the reality is that ONE DAY might never come. I am chasing an uncertainty at the cost of losing the certainty. I take out 5 minutes of my time in between my office and home office, for my kid and I get so much love and affection in those 5 minutes. I give him a hug while hurriedly pulling out my phone to check for a new email and in return he gives back 10 kisses and his undivided attention and affection. But I choose my emails and phone calls –WHY?

I hope one day, my heart will win over my brain and I will be able to truly able to differentiate between happiness and perceived happiness. I truly hope, one day I will break this slavery and will be a free man. A man with a life of his own, a man who wakes up to love and be loved, a man who has time for his loved ones, a man who works to live and not a man who lives to work.